A Mom Shares Her Story

Very Sentimental Me

2012-02-02T22:58:00.000-08:00

This song made me cry.

I Will Always Love You
Kenny Rogers

I saw you tonight
in the room where love had started once before.
And we opened up the skies.
With your loving eyes
you take me back where you belong in my heart.

One love frozen in time.
Never be a bad love.
Yours and mine.
But I still remain.
I will never change.

I will always love you.
I will always take your part.
And all the years of losing you.
And then being close to you again.
The very chance that I could take your heart.

Your hand in mine.
You are inside of me.
One more time.
Don't you remember me.
And the days that lie ahead
May all go wrong.

But tonight, my love,
there's no question in my mind where we should be.
It's clear that you're alone and I'm alone.
And all the fools have gone.
You open up so tears can fall from your eyes.

True love can never die.
We can make it one day, if we try.
Be there, sunshine or rain.
I will never change.

I will always love you.
I will always take your part.
And all the years of losing you and then
making love to you again.
The very chance that I could take your heart.

Your hand in mine.
I got a memory
for all time.
Don't you remember me.
Now my dream will come true
if you love me.

I will always love you.
I will always take your part.
And all the years of losing you and then
making love to you again.
The very chance that I could take your heart.
Your hand in mine.

Read more: http://forums.mukamo.com/romantic/4729-i-will-always-love-you-kenny-rogers.html#ixzz1lIdMP41x

Newbie

2011-04-11T22:40:00.000-07:00

This April 8, we got a new baby. Not a he, not a she but an 'it'.

My kids will surely have a great time playing with it.

Welcome home Civic :)

August Highlights

2009-09-01T01:24:00.000-07:00

In the hope of not forgetting big things that came in August, I’ll share whatever it is that I remember.

Aug. 3
Got Kenzo’s grades and am proud of the results. Of his 7 subjects, he got 5 perfect scores, 1 mistake in Math and a passing grade in Writing.

Aug.21
We celebrated Ate Rachel’s (Kenzo’s nanny) birthday at MOA where aside from the kiddie playrooms and the bay view we were also able to witness the fireworks that night.

Aug.22
Moments after Papa and Kenzo’s executive check-up, Arisha and I met them in Shangri-la so we could all see “UP” the movie. It was Arisha’s first ever cinema experience and she acted just like any matured viewers would. Kenzo on the other hand was getting a bit bored in some parts but good thing he had Cheeto’s to nail him down on his seat.

Aug. 27
Kenzo recited his 1st ever Tula for the Linggo ng Wika. He wasn’t proclaimed the winner but I was super proud he did have the courage to be upstage to deliver his piece in Tagalog.

Aug. 30
It was mine and Arisha’s executive check up. After that we thought of where to go next. My kids have been pointing on the rides they see in Dora and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. So for me to really give them a feel of what an amusement park would really look like, we brought the family to the Star City. Arisha as always enjoyed a ride at the Grand Carousel while Kenzo the privy just enjoyed some moments with the kids at the little tykes.

My Tribute to the King of Pop

2009-07-07T23:27:00.000-07:00

I didn’t realize until today that I was indeed mourning the loss of the King of Pop. I wasn’t crazy about his songs nor his dance moves. I didn’t even fancy about him as millions of people did. And with the ugly rumors that pulled him down, I didn’t even care to know about it. I didn’t love him but I didn’t hate him either. I just wasn’t an avid fan of his and that is what I thought before today.

I lived in his generation and I grew up to his songs. That is the connection of why I felt like he became a part of my world.

Now that he’s gone, I felt the loss. Suddenly, I feel for him. He was the only performer who made me feel that we are the world. I somehow believed he has unified if not at all the entire human race. He gave the people of his kind self respect and confidence by making them feel they are no different. Perhaps, he lived his life for the world.

As I watched his memorial until 4am this morning, I cried and grieved with the rest of the world. I had to say, MJ was indeed the Greatest Performer of All Time and I feel fortunate, I belonged to the time where he once lived.

Gone Too Soon

2009-06-25T22:32:00.000-07:00

I am saddened.
Why too soon? When there’s more to see.
His voice is yet the best to my ears three decades of my life.
I was getting excited to hear him sing again.
The wait is over
He won’t come again.
Never again.

Bye, MJ.

Blog Delays

2009-06-22T19:40:00.000-07:00

I have a lot of unfinished tasks here in my blog.

1. To continue 2004 to 2008 of my reflection. It's important for me to reflect on these years before the exciting 2010 arrives.

2. I still haven't blogged about Arisha and Kenzo attending a week long trial class in school. It's good to put here teachers evaluation of their performance in school. My kids will need to read it here in years.

3. I still haven't blogged about Kenzo's first week in school. He is a nursery pupil now at 3yo and I am surprised how he is enjoying school this time.

4. The Christian values in Kenzo is very much observed nowadays. When sick and I'd tell him we need to see his Doctor, he'd say "Jesus can cure me mama". Aww, I haven't taught of a Priest or Pastor son yet.

5. I haven't blogged about our very unique ID shots, rebrands and wonderful new changes in our company.

6. I haven't even mentioned here yet that it was our first time to meet and dine with our long time friends and their partners.

My list is piling. Let this be my guide when I finally have a dedicated time just for blogging.

Just Tonight

2009-05-31T08:22:00.000-07:00

Just tonight, will just think of myself.
Just tonight, will try to find peace in being alone.
Just tonight.

Am so exhausted...

Our NEMO

2009-05-19T19:51:00.000-07:00

He was given to us as a gift by Mang Greg, our long time security officer here in the office. There were 3 of us here in the office who were entrusted with three different baby fish to nurture. And since mine was orange, I named him Nemo. Our fish had a lifetime supply of food cos Mang Greg wanted to make sure we don't give him an altered diet.

A week after, I heard the other 2 baby fish did not make it. I joked that the caretakers who were both single didn't really know much about "raising" a baby fish.

Our Nemo is now on his 4th month with us but something bad happened just this morning.

I forgot to brief our new nannies of the water level in Nemo's aquarium. If water is too much, Nemo would jump out of his aquarium. Yes, he's done that several times before.

As I was to take a bath this morning, I was shocked to see Nemo's home empty. As I searched around, I saw him on the bathroom floor fighting for his life. There was blood. I supposed he was badly injured. Very carefully, I did try to pick him up and put him back in his aquarium. I tried to figure out where the blood was coming from. It came from his head.

I really don't know how I can help him. Mercy killing came to my mind at first but what if he can recover by himself?

A tiny fish with a major head injury fighting for his life. That's how our Nemo is now.

I left him in peace, hoping he has the power to cure himself. Hoping to see him well when we get home tonight. I told the nannies not to touch him til we come home. I didn't tell the kids about it.

He's just a fish, one may think. A tiny fish so easy to find. But he's not just our fish, he is our Nemo and he has been sharing life with us for so many months now. He's really a part of our family now.

I really wish he'll be ok.

Arisha Turns 2

2009-05-18T00:53:00.000-07:00

Even at 2, she is still very much our baby.

Yesterday was a pre-bday celebration over lunch at home and we were joined by mom-in-law, sis-in-law and cousins JC and Sean.

JC and Arisha took turns blowing the birthday cake as they both are celebrants this week. Hubby was the official videoman while sis-in-law was the photographer. I of course was the caterer and the nannies were our party coordinators. Kenzo and Sean were the entertainers.

As you see, everyone had a big role in our party athome. Oh btw, our motiff was "Pambahay".

What a party, super cool, super intimate, super family.

And even this simple, Arisha had her smile pasted on her face the entire time.

Tonight when hubby and I get home, Arisha is yet to blow her stawberry birthday cake.

Happy 2nd birthday, Dear Baby!

Ikaw

2009-05-11T23:42:00.001-07:00

Kumusta ka na?

Ok ka lang ba?

Ok naman ako. Masaya naman ako ngayon.

Sana ikaw din.

Sana pareho tayong masaya sa buhay natin ngayon.

Happy Mom's Day

2009-05-11T23:29:00.001-07:00

I owe these kids my Mommy badge. I just so love being a mom.

Happy Mom's Day to all the mom's out there.

Who Loves Bacteria?

2009-05-07T03:34:00.000-07:00

Kenzo does.

As he struggles not to take in his oral meds, he screamed love for bacteria and hate for meds.

????

I told him he needs to drink his meds to kill the bad, harmful bacteria that wiggles like worms in his tummy just so I can convince him to.

His answer now? "I hate medicines, keep it away, it's bad for me. I love bacteria now".

So there you can just imagine now how mom and son do the wrestling every 6 hours a day.

:P

Mom on Emergency Leave

2009-05-06T00:34:00.000-07:00

I took a week off from work to take care of Kenzo who was admitted in VRPMC, Mandaluyong last April 29 for Amoebiasis. It was his 2nd time in 3years to get hospitalized.

He's back home yesterday afternoon but is required to be under medication for 11 more days.

A Baby I Want to Meet

2009-04-22T23:47:00.000-07:00

There's a baby out there whom I want to meet and welcome into this world.

I am not the parent but I am as excited as any first time parent would be to see her own child for the first time.

Apparently, it's not that easy to just go say Hi to the baby. It takes painful and careful steps to be where she is.

It may sound complicated, it really is.

To say her name now is even forbidden.

I hope we could meet someday. Because I am excited to tell Dear Baby how blessed her Dad is to have her in his life.

Sunkissed Arisha

2009-04-19T22:07:00.000-07:00

Am just so blessed to have a daughter this beautiful.

Lent 2009

2009-04-14T02:31:00.000-07:00

After almost a year, we were again able to visit Nueva Vizcaya.

Still beautiful, still green, still rich.

But the best thing of all, I finally got the courage to go driving in town.

He Just Called

2009-04-02T21:16:00.000-07:00

Amazing!!!

Just as when I have finished writing my earlier entry, hubby called up. My cp in my bag was on a silent mode and I have forgotten to adjust the volume but still I was able to get his call. Amazing, again!

And he was asking me out for lunch :-)

Apparently, I had to say No but I will try to make it up later, if he asks me again.

I Am His Wife

2009-04-02T20:05:00.000-07:00

I've been too hard on hubby the past few days. I really don't know why I feel so upset about him. He did nothing wrong. He picks me up at work every night despite so. I can feel how he's been trying to reach out and how he'd get me to mellow down a bit. I am just so irritated really and I hate to admit I blame things on him just because. And for so many days now, we haven't really talked about us. We do talk but we don't talk like we're married. We don't talk like we're in love.

I read somewhere else that the good thing about marriage is that in the process, you tend to fall out of love then fall in love again with the person you married.

Am I in the process of falling out of love? Does he feel the same? Why have I been having thoughts on What if I was not married to him? Will I be happier? What if I ended up with someone from the past? Will I be happier? What if I ended up with someone I met along the way, Will I be missing Art?

Today, I have the answers to my questions. I still love my hubby and I still feel that I made the right choice when I chose to be married to him. I still find comfort in the thought that he is the person I will be spending my whole life with. I still choose not to trade the life I have with him now with someone else' life. I will miss him badly if I don't see him. I am still lucky I have a husband who stands by me even when I feel not like holding onto marriage. I know I am blessed for God gave me a husband who is a family man. And though these days we were not really 'talking', I still believe my husband is just giving me some time alone because I believe he thinks it's the best he can do now just so I won't give up on him.

I have to remind myself, we've been together since 16, we're married now for almost 5 years, we have 2 adorable kids who are so happy and secured being with us, we are not getting any younger and life is too short.

As I wrote Life is too short, I suddenly felt scared. I still pray for long life together. I still want us to be together for many many more years.

My writing this blog was a pouring out at the same time a realization. The moment I wrote about my sentiments, all the negative energies came out of me. I am now feeling better. I am now at peace again.

As I end this entry, I look forward to better moments again with my hubby. I feel that unlike the past few days, I am excited now to pick up the phone when he calls me later cos I know he deserves to hear me talking as his wife again.

I want to be his wife, again.

A Petty Fight Or So...

2009-03-30T23:03:00.000-07:00

Like any other normal couples, Art and I had our "not so good night" last night. He was irritated because I forgot buying a rubbing alcohol for a week now and I got so irritated that he blames me for it. Big time, noh? I was so super irritated that even when I thought of locking myself in the bathroom to stop me from freaking out, I was just way beyond control and I yelled at him.

Thunderstruck, my kids Kenzo and Arisha came to the rescue and tried to calm us both. Kenzo asked many times if we were fighting and if I were mad at his papa. Still anxious, I said "yes, I don't like your papa, tonight" then I locked myself in the bathroom.

While in the bathroom, I can hear my kids asking their yaya if I were mad at them too. Kenzo kept on asking for details while Arisha kept on saying "oh no! Mama"

After a while, I cuddled them both and told them to not be worried cos Pappa and Mamma were just "play acting". So there, we had to drop off irritations and pretend we're not.

I thought it would end up there but while I was putting my kids to sleep, Kenzo once again said Mama was mad of Pappa because Pappa was lazy. Art was startled.

If only looks could kill then maybe I am a dead meat now.

Destressed by a Movie

2009-02-10T19:18:00.000-08:00

I have been insomniac for more than a week now, perhaps, this is all because I am bothered by a lot of things that leaves me restless for days. And in my quest for peace of mind, I engaged myself into DVD marathons and coffee to dwindle away from my negative thoughts.

Of the films I've seen from my nights of depression, I was tearfully engrossed with Slumdog Millionaire and Changeling. These aren't the usual feel good movies that will make you chuckle and split your sides. But certainly, it has engaged both my fears and compassion that gave me a calming effect thereafter.

Changeling is a tale about one woman's quiet struggle to overcome insurmountable odds. With my favorite actress Angelina Jolie in the lead role directed by the unflappable Clint Eastwood. Every mother who will get to see this movie will be enthused.

Slumdog Millionaire is an underdog fable that is vivid, moving and breathless. It tells of a young man who travels from the slums to the hot seat of the Indian Who Wants To Be a Millionaire. This movie was Directed by Danny Boyle.

With these kind of destressors, I really wouldn't mind being insomniac for few more nights. Movies like this can be a good company in tough times.

My Dad's Bday

2009-02-08T23:22:00.000-08:00

Hi Dad!

You were supposed to be 59 today, I could have said you're just 1 year away to becoming a senior citizen. But you never really wanted to get old noh?

Seriously, I missed you today. I missed talking to you. I missed telling you how good a mommy I am to your grandkids.

If only you were here with us....

Happy birthday Dad! Have fun wherever you are now. I hope my whispers do reach your heart.

I love you and I miss you.

Untaming the Tamed

2009-02-02T18:57:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I wish to be out of control.

I have been the "good girl" since I was born. To my age now, I still am living a life in control. But how do I break free when it is my own will that I wanted to go against with? Crazy that I couldn't get lose from what I have become.

Mid life crisis, is this it?

I miss my bestfriend, Tequila.

My Uncle is Gone

2009-02-02T18:32:00.001-08:00

Tito Dado passed away early Sunday morning. I felt no pain having received the news of his death. But I will surely miss him.

The past few days had me weighing if I should go see him one last time. However, I decided not too. I don't want to see the face of a person so special to me suffering in pain. I wanted to remember him as my cool, cheerful Tito Dado.

Three brothers are now reunited up there. Tito Doming, My Dad and Tito Dado.

Good for them, they now all rest in peace.

Thinking of Home and Tito Dado

2009-01-27T21:50:00.001-08:00

For the past 3 years, I can only count few trips made home to my province. Because my kids are too young for the 8 hours road trip, it was arranged that my mom and parents in-law would just do the favor of visiting us here in the city as often as they can.

But now, I am thinking of home because I haven’t seen my relatives for almost a year already. And I am afraid I will no longer be able to see my Tito Dado.

A brother and a sidekick then to my Dad, Tito Dado was the only one I regularly see at home. He was never married. He was already content spending his life with his family taking care of his nieces and nephews until all have grown up to have a family of their own. He now devotes his time taking care of his sick mother, my lola.

I never asked why he didn’t marry. I never saw him going on a steady relationship either. I don’t think he is gay. Maybe, the big family he grew up with has already overwhelmed him that much. He is happy go lucky, I can’t blame him he had all his time for himself. One thing I really liked about him was his laughing trips. He was undeniably very consistently cool.

But today, I received the news that he is in the ICU since Saturday and that he may no longer make it. My mom’s helpers have been saying my Tito has been talking about going to a fun party somewhere else and that this week will be the end of his sufferings. My mom says he no longer looked like the Tito Dado I saw before. He now looked just like my dad on his deathbed. And because my mom sees my Dad in him, she gets so affected that she’s been spending a lot of time in his bedside.

And it gave me chills. I am thinking now if I should go home to go see my Tito Dado before it’s too late. Or is it because I wanted to see how my Dad looked like when he was about to go. These are my weird thoughts now. I want to see my Tito Dado and I want to see my Dad.

I miss them both. My Dad and my Tito Dado.

This is the sad part of life. When we grow old enough to be able to do things on our own, we cut the line from the people who we’ve once been depending on. And though we appreciate how they took care of us, it makes them sad to feel their purpose has been served and they are no longer needed.

I want to go home. I want to personally thank my Tito for helping me become the doting mom that I am now. If I never felt loved then I wouldn’t know how to love this way in return.

Business Plans

2009-01-25T19:34:00.001-08:00

Hubby and I are planning to put up our own business. We have the whole year to plan it out. We are setting our goal to launch our product in 2010.

I am excited. I hope this time it works out well.

At the moment, we still need to do a lot of research and consultations from the PROs.

Comment Ni Hubs (mi esposo)

2009-01-21T00:24:00.000-08:00

Touched daw siya when he read "what my heart speaks..." My wishes are so simple and yet I could not have it all. He had to reflect daw tuloy for a while how he can make me happy again. Nagi-guilty daw siya.

Ang sabi ko naman, the fact na nagkaroon siya ng time basahin ang blog ko, masaya na ako. I never really expected him to drop by my site, anyway. (Hindi lang nagdrop by, nagbasa pa talaga)

Funny Quotes by Kenzo

2009-01-19T21:21:00.000-08:00

Pag pinagagalitan ni yaya si Kenzo for hurting Arisha.

Kenzo: Go home to the province ate, go home now.

Yaya: I am sad. Ok, I will go home now.

Kenzo: Don't be sad, ate. I will follow, ok?

Pag pinalo sa kamay (kunwari, right hand)

Kenzo: Oh, how about my left hand?

Pag may gusto ipabili.

Kenzo: Give me your celphone ate.

Yaya: Why?

Kenzo: I need to text mama. I will tell her to buy toys.

kunwari text text naman daw sa cp....

Kenzo: Here, read it ate! It say's "buy toys...." Send it to mama's number ate.

Kagabi, we told him to stop hitting and bullying his sister. Instead, he should take care of her.

Kenzo: ok mama, i will not hurt Arisha. Stop getting mad at me too, ok? and don't hit me too. You take care of me, ok?

This morning bago ako umalis ng bahay

Mama: Kenzo, remember what I told you last night? don't hurt your sister, ok?

Kenzo: Ok mama.

And then I heard him say,

Kenzo: Ate, can I hit Arisha?

(hahahaha atleast nagpapaalam na bago manakit)

My Heart Speaks

2009-01-15T01:05:00.000-08:00

What if I Ain’t a Mom Yet?

I could have been to many different places especially with all those tempting package tours available now.
I could have been a lawyer or a nurse.
Most likely a shopaholic of the best brands available in town.
Can Gimik anywhere at anytime with friends.
Could have resigned from my work and could have enriched my career.
Can get trendy hairstyles from famous hair dressers
Can buy the latest gadgets anytime.
Can get all the sleep that I want.
Can eat lunch and dinner out everyday.
See a movie twice a day.

It’s my random list of the top 10 things occupying my mind at this moment right here in my workplace. And though it gives me a sense of satisfaction to have lived that life some 3 years ago, I still have no regrets. I am realizing now, that I cannot replace the fulfillment I get from being a mom to my kids from my once very carefree life.

My realizations:

I have not traveled a lot because I will miss playing, singing, talking with my kids and reading them books at bed time. I could not take them to places as well because they are too young to enjoy traveling. I have to plan the family travels when they are both fully potty trained and bottle-free and are able to appreciate places. Otherwise, I could just imagine how tiring it would be to fill up our luggage. And if hubby and I would insist, our kids would just be left behind with their nannies overnight. And I can’t let that happen.
If I went back to law school, then maybe I could have forgotten about becoming a mom. If I pursued nursing, then maybe I could have left the country years ago and have not bore a child to this time.
I wouldn’t have appreciated tiangges/bazaars, buying on sale, haggling for costs.
It feels wonderful to be home at night times especially with the kids sharing stories of how they spent another day. And then in bed, you’d feel them lay their heads on your arm and be their biggest comfort in their sleep.
My job is very humbling but the reason I never turned my back on it is because my family time is very much respected. I can be away even with a short notice only and I can have all my time for my family.
I found out I don’t need to go try all the newest in hair trends. I am still beautiful (my son says so) with my hair whatsoever. Confidence comes from within. And for my hair, shampooing and conditioning is more than enough to keep it silky and shiny J
All I can say is, OMG! I hear about iphones but how does it differ from Samsung as shown in TV anyway. After I’ve lost 3 phones last year, I only have 3310 with me anywhere. Who cares to rob me now? I feel safe with it anyway. Hubby so admires me for this. I appreciate that he keeps offering me a better cellphone but I keep telling him to not worry about it, he can just give me the money and I can use it for our family needs.
More bedtime bonding moments with kids. Enough sleep is also my secret to younger looking skin ehem.
Dinner and lunch outs were not as much as before because I always think of how the money spent in one particular dining can give us more options for family weekend bonding activities. And I get to show off not just practice my cooking skills.
Ouch! To see a movie nowadays is too expensive. We just try to watch once in a while and this are for the choices we think are great when seen in the big screen.

My life has changed as I became a mother. My wishes now are not of the things that will help me get back my old life. It’s all for my kids now because I want them to grow experiencing good life. And to see them happy and living in comfort everyday is what makes me fulfilled now. I will never be a lawyer, not even sure if I can still be a nurse. But I will always be a mother to Kenzo and Arisha and a supportive wife to Art. I am looking forward to what will happen next in my life. One thing remains, I am never leaving my family behind.

Happy 3rd Bday, Kenzo

2009-01-11T21:16:00.000-08:00

January 10, 2009

To my favorate Son (cos Arisha is my favorate daughter naman :-)), I am super happy, super fulfilled, super proud that you are my son. I super love you and I just can't think of living my life not having you. You (and Arisha) made my life complete. Being a mom to you and Arisha is the best thing that ever happened in my life. I vow to stay beside you, nurture you and dedicate my time to your growing years. Papa and I will stick with you through thick and thin. Walang iwanan. We will go anywhere together, we will never leave one behind.

Trick or Treat '08

2008-11-03T02:18:00.000-08:00

Last Friday, had my kids Kenzo and Reese parade in their halloween costumes at SM Megamall. We just walked through the mall and did not actually get to stop by the shops to ask for treats. My kids were happy and content just walking around and enjoying the crowd.

A day before Halloween celebration, I was already getting excited to dress up Reese as "Tinker Bell" but when I was trying the purple gown on her, she's been crying her lungs out not to. I wonder why she didn't like it when I thought she will really look good in it. Isn't she girly by nature? or could it just be that the gown is not appealing to her at all. When I tried on the Little Devil costume of Kenzo last year, she was too excited and happy to try it. So there, my Tinker Bell ended up being the Li'l Devil. Not bad anyway cos she really looked good in it after all.

As for Kenzo, I really have been getting tired of looking the perfect costume for him days before. The "kuripot" that I am now did not want to spend a thousand bucks for an outfit that will last for only an hour on him (That's if I am too lucky pa) but goodness gracious saved me from buying when I found the leopard overall I've been keeping for a year now. So lucky me it still fits him well and he likes it and enjoys it.

And with all those savings I have, I am happy to say they still look this adorable

Tears in Heaven

2008-10-20T04:27:00.000-07:00

When papa passed away 5 years ago, I always had this song playing in my mind everytime I think of him.

Now that "All Soul's Day" is nearing and our family couldn't go home to visit him in the "park", this song keeps on playing everywhere I go.

Is it just pure coincidence?
Or is he reminding me that it is I who have forgotten him?

Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven?
Would it be the same
If I saw you in heaven?

I must be strong
And carry on,
'Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven.

Would you hold my hand
If I saw you in heaven?
Would you help me stand
If I saw you in heaven?

I'll find my way
Through night and day,
'Cause I know I just can't stay
Here in heaven.

Time can bring you down,
Time can bend your knees.
Time can break your heart,
Have you begging please, begging please.

Beyond the door,
There's peace I'm sure,
And I know there'll be no more
Tears in heaven.

Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven?
Would it be the same
If I saw you in heaven?

I must be strong
And carry on,
'Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven.

Take it Easy

2008-10-20T04:22:00.001-07:00

Life is difficult these days. Good thing I have my kids and my super loving hubby to remind me how easy it can be with them in my life.

Hay, I'm pagod yet happy!

It's nicely

2008-10-20T03:40:00.000-07:00

When he isn't in the mood, he'd really be hot headed.

Kenzo: Arisha, stay away from the TV. I am watching. I said, I am watching. Stay away now!

Mama: Sshh Kenzo, that's not the way to talk to your sister. Say it nicely.

Kenzo: It's nicely Arisha. I am saying it.

But he really cares too.

Mama: Kenzo, I am tired.

Kenzo: Just sit down, ok? and don't go outside, ok? because it's a sunny day and it's really hot out there, ok?

another caring incident with Papa

Kenzo: Don't disturb papa, Arisha. He needs to work on the computer, ok? come here and just sit down here and play with my toys, ok?

He uses the word "ok" many many times.

Mom's 55th Bday

2008-10-20T03:38:00.000-07:00

My mom celebrates her 55th birthday today. I just wished her a happy day today. I'll save whatever plans I have when she visits us this weekend.

5 Years Today

2008-09-01T02:45:00.001-07:00

Just couldn't forget the day you left us.

I miss you, Dad.....

And I'll take care of Mom, I promise you that.

I Am Going to Become a Nurse

2008-08-25T21:41:00.000-07:00

I keep telling myself this just so I wouldn't quit.

Mommy Goes to School...Again.

2008-08-25T21:19:00.000-07:00

That mommy is me :-)

I have reached past mid semester already and am super proud to be still in school no matter how difficult it was for me to make adjustments in my family time, my work, myself and my studies.

I am hoping I will finish the program in 2 - 3 years. I have too because by then, my kids will be attending grade school already. So now is my only chance.

Am really excited about the year 2010, I don't know but I just feel it will bring a dramatic change in our family life.

Yey, I could also be a Registered Nurse by then.

So excited about what the future may be :p

My Feelings Right Now

2008-08-06T01:02:00.000-07:00

It's weird.

I think I am stressed but I doubt it.
I am worried about something I don't know.
I hate that I am in the middle of something big at work and though I believe I can deal with it I am just not inspired to do it.
I feel like not working here anymore but I need to because I am paid quite good.
I have my midterm exams tomorrow but I haven't even scanned my notes yet.
I miss my kids, I see them every day but the quality time spent with them is becoming less.
I can't buy the bag and lipstick that I want because I need to pay something in school.
I have lots of cash on hand right now but I can't spend it - It's like this every time.
I don't want to disturb hubby.
I want to make good in school but I couldn't dedicate even just my needed time for it.

I feel Scattered.

Sweet Child of Mine

2008-06-20T00:52:00.000-07:00

I wonder what you'll become when you grow up.

Everywhere we go, you never get unnoticed.

Love letter to Teacher

2008-06-20T00:44:00.001-07:00

Stage mother says my inlaw. Am not naman. Am just scared, worried, paranoid.

It's also my first time to have a child in school.

And so I wrote this letter for the teachers of Kenzo.

June 17, 2008

Dear Teacher Jenny and Teacher Pia,

Thank you for having Kenzo in your class. I am really praying he could fit in the group even if he is the smallest and the youngest by far J I cannot explain the feeling of seeing my son in school for the first time. It was like he was my baby all the time until today.

However, the scared mommy that I am would like to raise some minor concerns before I totally turn over my son to your care in the next coming 2 hours of everyday. I hope you understand my thoughts as I really have the tendency to become paranoid when it comes to his safety (which I am sure is just a normal feeling of every mom sending her child to school for the first time especially at a very early age).

Self Care

o Please assist him in putting on and taking off his shoes. Sorry, but I really haven’t trained him on this yet. Kindly try doing it for me, please?

o Washing of hands in the sink. He is too short to reach the faucet.

o Potty training. He still poops in his diaper and when this happens in another place, he isolates himself from the group until he sees his yaya. When you feel he has pooped, please call his attention in private and tell his yaya to clean him up. Kenzo is very conscious with anything that is unclean and unpleasant to the smell.

o He is still learning to eat by himself.

Discipline

o I understand that there will be some occasions that would require him discipline. May I request you to please talk to him in private and in a gentle manner to correct his misdeed as it has been proven effective that way as practiced in our home.

Bully vs Bullied

o The one thing that scares me the most especially because he is mixed with bigger and older boys. I am scared for him to experience physical hurts (like being spanked, pushed very hardly, stabbed by a pencil etc.) Thus my extra request for you to please keep an eye on him all the time while he is too young to protect his self yet.

Meal time

o Until he is ready to do it on his own, kindly extend assistance to him during meal time.

I hope my concerns will help you deal with my son in an easier way. I would also appreciate if you can keep me updated of his behavior in school. Most of all, I hope this could be a good start of a partnership with you in helping my son grow to become a good person.

Sincerely,

Kenzo's Mom

Gummy Smile

2008-06-20T00:37:00.000-07:00

My baby doesn't care if this is all that her smile can bear.

May those teeth come out soon :P

Kenzo and School

2008-06-19T01:23:00.000-07:00

He was supposed to be in a toddler class at the Hopeful Beginnings Development Center but because the other 4 enlisted did not show up, the school had to cancel the program and move Kenzo to the nursery level.

The school administrator told us if we are to accept their proposal, they are willing to give Kenzo a 1 month trial in the nursery class. If after a month we find that the program is too tiring and stressful, we can take him off the class with a guarantee of full refund on our fees.

Not bad, noh?

The nursery class had 11 pupils majority of which were 4 years old and Kenzo was the youngest and smallest at just 2.5yo. There were 2 teachers for this class. The program was a mix of Montessori and the classroom style.

The two hours program is divided in this manner:

10:00 Play/socializing time.

10:30 Story time

11:00 Snack Time

11:30 Singing/Dancing/coloring time (it varies everyday)

12:00 Before you’ll know it, it’s going home time

On his 1^st day, Kenzo was excited and scared. Excited, because there were many toys he can play with. Scared, because the place was new to him and some kids were crying and screaming to get out of the room.

On his 2^nd day, he was a bit brave already. I left him without him noticing me leaving. But yaya was just around for him to cling on just in case.

On his 3^rd day (just a while ago), he was confident already. He forgot about us and he just mingled with his classmates. Yaya said she tried hiding in a corner where Kenzo couldn’t see her. And Kenzo was too busy he didn’t actually call for yaya anymore.

And that’s it! Teacher was so happy to tell us how quickly my boy has adjusted. We are getting ready to buy his uniforms now.

Btw, we will be having our PTA meeting this Saturday. Am excited!!!

For My baby Arisha

2008-06-13T03:09:00.000-07:00

I love you, Anak.

And even though I seldom write about you, I hope you know it's because I try to manage my time at work as wisely as I can to be able to go home early so I can play with you.

I am so proud of you.

And I really, really love you so so much.

More on Arisha's party

2008-05-22T00:04:00.001-07:00

The Party theme was Mickey Mouse Clubhouse

I was super busy this month I prepared for the party for less than 2 weeks. I made use of whatever pictures were available at hand as I didn't have the time to bring my little girl to the studio anymore.

Arisha's Minnie Mouse cake
There was no electricity that day but the baker, though an hour late, managed to come up with this one.

Arisha on her throne

The tarpaulin designed by me

The invitation designed by me.

Visit my multiply account for more party pictures

Arisha's 1st Birthday

2008-05-21T23:12:00.000-07:00

Arisha's party was a double celebration with his cousin Jumer Clark's 2nd birthday. Jumer's mom is hubby's elder sister and since she is in abroad, we took care of all the preparations and decided on doing his party on Arisha's day.

Organizing their party was pretty difficult. Preparation is in Manila for the party in Nueva Vizcaya. So I had to coordinate most of the time with my mom and my mom-in-law. The lolas were good actually. They made things happen.

A day before the party, hubby and I have been driving around just to find the one and only clown that we have in town. Alas, we didn't find him.

Few hours before the party was about to begin, we were already feeling the threat of 'Halong'. It made me worried sick that there may be no guests arriving.

But'Halong' wasn't strong enough to stop our guests from coming. Despite the strong rains and the rising flood, we still counted a total of 140 guests. And as most of the elders in our hometown says, a storm on Arisha's birthday could mean more blessings in her life. I have to believe that because the number of people who shared that special day with my daughter and her cousin is one big proof of how special she is to everyone who came.

My Lovely Little Baby Girl

2008-03-30T22:58:00.001-07:00

From the Proud Mamma

Certified "Kikay"

2008-02-29T02:39:00.000-08:00

Sweetie Arisha finally had her ears pierced last Saturday at her Doctor's clinic. I have actually been looking forward to this since her 1st day on Earth.

As for the moment, her doctor insists on not taking off the pair of earrings gunned to her earlobes until after her 1st birthday. But that's ok since I think the star studs look great in her anyway.

So I guess the diamonds will really have to wait a little more time.

Kenzo says The Sweetest Thing

2008-02-26T00:04:00.000-08:00

After 2 years, 1 month, 2 weeks and 2 days on earth Kenzo finally said the sweetest thing every parents would die hearing from their own child.

He said:
"Pappa? I love you, Pappa (Muwah)
"Mamma? I love you, Mamma (Muwah)

Ain't that sweet? :P

Money matters

2008-02-12T01:45:00.000-08:00

I just have one wish today.....

To have much more than enough money in my purse...

Even after settling the bills.
Even after buying my babies' basic needs
Even after setting aside money for my babies' vaccines
Even after doing the grocery
Even after paying the nannies

Hindi naman ako mukhang pera palagi. Only this time, especially now that I could hardly manage our cash flow.

Hay life, please don't be as difficult as it is today tomorrow. I don't want to feel low just because I am running short of cash.

If you life would like to teach me some lessons I can learn from, tama na pls. I am learning from my mistakes already. Don't push it harder. Ayoko na.

So please, Can I have my money back?

untitled

2008-01-31T01:19:00.000-08:00

I am not really in the mood to write today but I thought I just needed to post something for January.

As always, I have no other things in mind but my babies, my family. I seldom talk about other things but them. This makes me realize that my life revolves around them alone. How long have I been like this? I believe from the time I became a mom.

I wish I can talk about some other things too but Sorry I really got nothing else to share than this:

and this:

and this:

lastly, this:

Oh yeah, I know I got so many things to share but for now let me just end this month with what inspires me the most - my Family.

Kenzo turns 2

2008-01-10T20:31:00.000-08:00

Kenzo is now 2 year old.

Hubby and I took a leave from work yesterday to spend the whole day with our son.

It was a very simple but warm celebration at home. It is more of a family celebration rather than a children's party (save for that on his 3rd bday).

Anyway, his birthday celebration is not over yet....am considering the next weekend for a family get away.

*************************************************************************************

Happy birthday, Kenzo. I am still ecstatic to be your mom. I love you always, son.

Xmas Party '07

2007-12-13T23:08:00.000-08:00

I went dancing last night.
After more than 10 years of being just in the backstage, I realized there's more to look back to if I chose to be upstage.

Now, I have my confidence back.
And I'm feeling great!

Arisha's GodParents

2007-12-06T19:50:00.000-08:00

To the Ninongs and Ninangs of Arisha:

May each of you give our dear Arisha all the support, love and guidance as she grows.

Ninongs:
Mr. Wilbert Pascasio - My 1st cousin on my mother's side. A loving Dad to his 4 kids
Mr. Andy Reyes - An officemate, A Couple's for Christ Leader, A loving Dad to his 2 kids.
Mr. Edyson Henson - A highschool friend, a new dad to his few months old baby.
Mr. Caloi Aguinaldo - An officemate with a big heart for kids.
Mr. Dominic Taplan - A cousin from Art's side, very loving Uncle to his nephews and Nieces
Mr. Ryan Patrick Fernandez - An officemate and a Daddy in the making

Ninangs:
Atty. Floriza Labog - A very good friend way back in HS and is almost my sister
Ms. Goldie Estigoy - My housemate in College who taught me how to cook.
Ms. Abigail Abalos - Another housemate in college who is now a mom with 3 kids
Ms. Edna Magbojos - My roommate in college, my maid of honor
Ms. Nova Bagasao - My 1st cousin from my mother's side
Ms. Armida Abad - Art's youngest sister

My Babies Are Safe With Me

2007-12-06T01:37:00.000-08:00

Am I less of a mom because I couldn't be a SAHM?
Am I compromising my babies welfare by leaving them to their nannies care 8-9 hours a days from Mondays to Fridays?
Have it been better if I left my babies in our province to stay with their lolo and lola rather than their nannies?

*******

I can't be a SAHM because I need my job to help my husband raise our kids and send them to a good school someday.
Good thing is, I have a job that gives me a decent pay and a manageable time plus a boss who is Pro-family. Whatelse? My work location is just 15-20 minutes away from home.

My earnings enable me to pay the bills, buy my babies their own brands of milk and diaper every week, good food at the dinner table, vitamins, monthly check ups and vaccines and the weekend treats for family bonding moments.

********

Before I made a decision to remain a working mom, I partnered with my mama to help find me reliable nannies. Of course I am scared of all the horrible yaya stories I've been reading from everywhere. I also prayed for God to send us an 'angel' yaya. God never failed me.

Though the yayas are the primary caregivers to my babies while I'm at work, I still do my part using the hours I have before and after work.

*******

Just like other Lolas, my mom wanted so much to take my babies with her in the province but when she saw how my babies were loved and taken cared of despite me not being a SAHM, she was convinced that it is best for them to stay with me.
She said she admires me for how I am as a mom to my babies. For Kenzo who is very smart, very respectful, very sweet and very much a loving 'baby kuya' to his baby sister, Arisha.

*******

Even if I am a working mom, I never fail to
1. Tell Kenzo and Arisha how much I love them morning and night (and thru phone calls when I'm not home)
2. Kiss and hug them everyday
3. Check their food and grocery supplies and toiletries.
4. Check on their health everyday
5. Take care of them myself in times they needed me most.
6. Read them books, teach them words, watch movies with them.
7. Prepare their food: Mashed for Arisha and table food for Kenzo
8. Change their diapers at night.
9. Trim their finger/toe nails.
10. Treat them out on weekends.
11. Shop for them.
12.Set time for play time.
13. Brush Arisha's tounge and help Kenzo brush his teeth
14. Clean and sterilize their feeding bottles, sippy cups, plates, forks and spoons.
15. Soothe their tantrums.

16.Think of them all the time.
17. be their MOM

********

And because my babies are with me, I can never miss the chance of seeing them grow each day.

Arisha' Christening

2007-12-04T01:17:00.000-08:00

I am super thankful, my daughter's baptismal celebration was a blast!

Unlike Kenzo's lavish baptismal party last year, Arisha's was not at all grand in preparation but it came out simply elegant.

I am so proud of myself too for being able to manage a very decent party on a low budget.

Let me recount how I did it.

First thing I looked for was the reception, The Imperial Treasure along Shaw Boulevard. I worked closely with the Manager, Mr. Lino Pigue, who helped me come up with a great meal for approximately Php 240 per head only.

This is the menu served per table of 10 and it was indeed plentiful!

Bird's Nest Soup
Oriental Fried Rice
Miki Bihon Guisado
Fish Fillet with salt & Pepper
Braised Pata Tim w/ Vegetable
Fried Chicken in Lemon Sauce
Sesame Balls

Oh, all my guests were so happy with the food. Thanks to Mr. Lino. Now another friend of mine will be having her party there too. And as of today, I heard that our company have already booked the place for our Field Group Christmas party.

The only thing here though is that they don't decorate the place according to theme. But it's not a problem at all since the place is clean, the walls are rich in color, the chairs are new and the tables are neatly covered. But because I wanted to have a theme, I ordered balloon centerpieces at Php203.00 each from National Bookstore in Shangri-la and some pearlized balloon on sticks from Chingkoy's at Shaw Blvd. I also had a personalized 3 x 5 ft tarpaulin for Php575.00 only.

The colorful teddies were our giveaways. We got each at Php60.00 each from Divisoria mall. The cake was from Ms. Beth of Tender Trap for Php1,500. It may look simple but it's what I actually requested for. The simpler, the better.

As for the church, I was actually choosing between St. Francis of Assisi Parish and Our Lady of Fatima Church. The first one does not offer a "special" baptism while the other 1 does. But since I am reminded to work on a budget, I confirmed my booking with St. Francis just 2 weeks before December 1.
There were I think about 4 - 5 babies christened that day. It wasn't bad at all. I first thought mass baptisms wouldn't give us the privilege to have our baby privately attended to, good thing we were seated at the very front row giving us the chance to be closer to the priest.

The invitations were from me. I had to steal some working hours to do it while at the office. Thank you that I have a deskjet printer, the print quality was great.

I made the giveaway tags too.

I Had 60 guests all in all. My closest friends & relatives. My special thanks to my Auntie Lyla ( I know how busy you were but you still managed to surprise me with your presence), Auntie Lou and Ate Josie and her baby girl.

But all could have been better if the party I organized for my daughter was properly documented. I didn't hire a photographer so I just relied on pictures taken by us and by friends. Very unfortunately, the person I assigned to take charge of taking pictures didn't show up. So now, I can only describe the place based on what I have seen. Alas, it could have been described better if it were picture perfect.

And Kuya Kenzo too....

2007-11-18T22:47:00.001-08:00

More Reese

2007-11-18T22:44:00.001-08:00

Our 1st Family pix with Reese

2007-11-18T22:43:00.001-08:00

My Cute Lil' Devil

2007-11-05T01:59:00.000-08:00

Wag the tail

Wide smile

Rest a little

Surrender to Pappa

Trick or Treat in AIM

2007-10-25T20:16:00.000-07:00

Yey! in just few hours, Kenzo will be joining his dad in the Monster parade at the AIM.

I still don't know how hubby will look like but Kenzo will be dressed up as "little devil" with his bestfriend Elmo tagging along.

After AIM, Kenzo goes to Megamall on October 31 for another Trick or Treat experience.

Hmmm.....maximize the "lil devil attire"

Will post pictures next week.

Where is Reese?

2007-10-21T22:14:00.000-07:00

Has anyone seen my baby girl??!!

Do let me know.

Remembering Papa

2007-08-31T01:47:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is my dad's 4th Death Anniversary.

I am happy because up to this time, I still see him in my dreams. I still remember his face so well and I feel like he's just home in the province.

I believe in my heart, he never left us for good. His loving memories remain.

"ELMOstruck"

2007-08-14T00:59:00.000-07:00

Kenzo thinks Elmo is his bestfriend. He's been liking him since he was half a year old. His first ever VCD purchase was the Sesame St's "Kids Favorate Songs 2". And no matter how many times it is being played on, he still watches it with enthusiasm, always like the first time.

Goodness indeed when we heard about the "Sesame St. Live World Tour" coming to the Philippines. Thought this was his chance to 'meet' his bestfriend in person.

The date was set on July 21, 11am at the Aliw Theatre and we got us VIP seats to give Kenzo an up close view.

When the show started, Kenzo was mesmerized. I think he couldn't believe his eyes that what he has been watching on TV is real and is right in front of him. And when Elmo came out, My boy! he stood up and was clapping his hands and swaying his body the whole time.

Towards the end of the show, Elmo with the rest of his buddies approached Kenzo and some of the kids near the stage. My little boy's eyes were sparkling in disbelief for an ELMOexperience.

He was awestruck. Well, I guess, ELMOstruck.

Arisha Javen

2007-08-13T01:04:00.000-07:00

Also known as: IRISH or REESE

1 and a half month old

Kenzo Talks

2007-08-13T00:40:00.000-07:00

Me: Baby, if someone asks you what your name is, you should answer by saying "I am Jov Arkenzo Abad"

Kenzo: (playing with his toys, as if he didn't hear me)

Me: let's practice. What is your name?

Kenzo: (quiet)

After 3 attempts and no answer, I was almost about to give-up but...

Kenzo: "is Abad"

How cute!

Now I am overwhelmed by his learnings. He can say his age. He can identify things. He can utter the name of Irish. He knows his body parts. He can sing the happy birthday song. He can dance. He knows some of the heavenly bodies and yes, he can count from 1 to 10 and he partially memorizes the Alphabet.

Whew!

Back to Work

2007-08-13T00:14:00.000-07:00

After 78 days maternity leave + 5 days vacation leave, I had to take one painful step again - leaving my babies at home with their nannies.

Last night, I had a heart to heart talk with my son, Kenzo. I told him how sorry I am to not be able to wake up with him every morning (because he wakes up at 9am and I should be out of the house by 8am). That I feel bad not to be able to personally feed him his favorate foods. That I can't watch TV with him. Can't nap with him. That in a week, I only have all evenings and 2 full days to offer him.

He was listening very quietly. I think he understands that momma has to work to help pappa give him and Irish a better life in the future.

I also told him to watch over his baby sister.

This morning, I could'nt leave home just like that. I know I got no more reasons to be late for work but I took the risk. I waited for Kenzo to wake up. And when he saw me dressed up for work, he just smiled at me. When I stepped out of the door, I waited a little. He was just looking at me calmly. No tantrums, no loud cries. At the gate, I was almost teary eyed. How come my son has adjusted to the situation right away?

I think it is me who needed to face reality.

It really is hard to be a working mom. If only I can be sure of the future here in our country, I wouldn't mind being a SAHM.

On Maternity Leave

2007-06-28T02:38:00.000-07:00

I currently am.

I have given birth to my beautiful baby girl, Arisha Javen, last May 18, 2007 at 11:04am, the VRPMC in Mandaluyong City.

Right now, I am having a grand time being a full time mamma to my babies.

I will resume work in August.

12th Year Anniversary

2007-04-16T22:16:00.000-07:00

Happy 12th year to Art and me!!!

I feel that our relationship has been truly blessed all these years. There maybe some flaws but we managed to overcome our differences.

12 years now, but we're still together...we're still happy with each other.

May we have many more years of love to count.

How He Loved His Son

2007-03-08T00:42:00.000-08:00

These stolen shots were taken by none other than me. When my son grows up, I want him to see how his pappa has loved him so much that he wanted to be at his side at all times.

At the hospital when Kenzo was sick. That five long days, Pappa, despite his busy schedule, never left us alone.

Pappa here making sure he's giving all his loving care and warmth to his sick baby.

And here, Pappa patiently nourishes his little boy who was already getting dehydrated from continuous pooping and vomitting.

Sweet Baby Smiles

2007-03-08T00:28:00.000-08:00

These photos were taken last February 16, 2007 at the VRPMC Hospital where he was confined for 5 long days due to dehydration from "Gastroenteritis".

The days before this was him just lethargic, sick and weak.

New Blog

2007-03-07T23:23:00.000-08:00

I can no longer access my old blogs: Mommy Talk and Love Talk. Sigh.

Lovetalk was where I share anything about love.

Mommy Talk was where I was supposed to share the milestones of my firstborn, Kenzo. But I guess, it was meant to be gone to open a new site where I can welcome the coming of Irish, my second baby.

So yes, this is my new haven and I welcome you all.